D Day: A Ridge too far ...

In the confusion and the transition of the previous year, I had somehow forgotten to write about the climax of the Goecha La trek. It has been more than a year since I had written about the 3rd day of the trek. After that so many things happened at rapid progression and I got entangled into the web of life at crossroads. I have been fairly active with travel in Korea and a few weeks back had my first taste of winter sports. But somehow amidst all the organised tourist attractions, I miss the wild adventure and the remoteness of the Himalayas.
On the 3rd night, we camped in the meadows of Thangsing. The rain had subsided but the clouds still persisted. But somehow in my heart I knew that the clouds will part the next day. I reminded Tsering how important next day was and inspite of the potential problems that we were likely to face, I convinced him to go ahead with the initial plans (start at 3am in the morning and reach Goecha La by 8am). However the problems were really serious and might even put our safety into jeopardy. Firstly, not enough headlamps. Without it we'd have to rely on Tsering to lead us through the easiest route. Secondly, the terrain. After Thangsing, we'd head into the terminal moraine of the glacier. It had rained in the lower altitudes which means that at 4500m, it had snowed. So the route, which mostly consists of boulder field would be snowbound. Without adequate lights, we'd have to be really carefully. Thirdly, fatigue and injury. Billa's ankle was not a good condition. I had barely slept for almost a week now. The lack of proper diet and our desperate push to Dzongri had left us very tired. Our bodies were performing beyond the normal biological limits and were in the risk of snapping.
Tsering came over to our tent at around 2am. There was a thick cloud cover with very poor visibility and I was feeling quite sick (maybe due to the fatigue), so we decided to wait for the clouds to clear before we venture out into the unknown terrain. And that was the biggest tactical mistake. It might have been very risky but that was the only possibility that we had of reaching Goecha La. As soon as I agreed to Tsering's idea of waiting for things to get better, my 'mountain instincts' told me that the mission was over. But still for the safety of all and just to grab a couple of hours of sleep, I decided to wait. At around 5am, the clouds began to part and we got ready to go. I came out of the tent to look out at the sunrise over Pandim. It was golden and resplendent - all shining in the glory of the morning with the bright blue sky. The look on my face was very different - dark circle around the eyes, disheveled hair and a defeated look. But it didn't stay for long. After days of cloud, rain, darkness and uncertainty, I saw the sun after what seemed an eternity. With the possibility of Goecha La almost gone, we decided to go as far as we could at a relaxed pace. It was very different from the past 3 days - gone was the almost fanatical push and the sense of purpose. It was a relaxed stroll 3 miles above sea level to as far as we could go.
It was too late to attempt Goecha La and even if we could make to that point, the pass would be covered in clouds by the time we reach it in the early afternoon - hardly affording the view that we wanted at sunrise.
We set out at 6:30 carrying just water and our lunch with us. We enjoyed the sun after a really long time and walked without after our backpacks, hopping boulders and small side-streams. There were wildflowers all aorund us and the mighty K massif ahead of us at the end valley. On our left was the Prek Chu river and on our right were the peaks of Tenzing Khang and Pandim. At Lamuney, we saw the expedition tents of the group trying to summit Tenzing Khang. We heard from the porter that it was supposed to be there summit day and we tried to figure out the climbers on the upper ice-fields with our binoculars. After Lamuney, we entered the terminal moraine of the glacier. We reached Samiti Lake at around 9 in the morning, as clouds over took us and raced towards the pass, blocking our view of K. However, the full view of Tenzing Khang and its almost magical shape lifted our spirits to some extent. We had a quite lunch on the banks of the Samiti Lake and observed some wild blue sheep (Bharal) on the ridge on the eastern bank.
The rest of the trek was downhill journey - literally and figuratively. For the first time in my life, I had been defeated by the mountain - not by a mistake in the strategic decision on my part but by my own laziness and the lack of faith in myself. I'll always regret not waking up at 2am on that cloudy night and not having enough faith in my own instincts. As I realised later that we could have made it to Goecha La on that morning under perfect weather conditions, if we had started at the right time. The clear weather window opened for 2 days but we didn't have that extra day to spare and hence had to return without achieving our objectives. I was very very disappointed but it taught me the importance of respecting the limits of human endurance. Goecha La is still an unconquered frontier in my life.
Some pictures from the 'summit day'