Floating in between dream and reality

The window didn’t shut properly and through the small gap, the cold crept in. I tried my best to improvise but it was useless. At last I gave up trying to sleep and decided to stay awake and think about the things to come. I looked out at the passing stations – deserted for most parts except for a few scattered fires around which the people huddled to escape from the cruel grip of the cold. I wrapped the blanket around me and leaned against the window. My breath condensed against the glass and periodically the outside world faded out for sometime. Most of the time it was too dark to see anything outside. I could make out the vague outlines of the trees against the sky and the flicker of light in a distant house. Sometimes the highway ran next to the train line and a bus or a truck or a car accompanied the train for some time, moving away as the track moved away from the road. When the train stopped at some major station, people boarded the train and moved along the aisle searching for their place. The haunting monotony of the sound of the running train would be broken by human voices – concerned voices, irritated voices, happy voices, sad voices. Mothers calling out to their children, husbands talking to their wives, children talking to their parents as they embark on a new vacation. I sat motionless, leaning against the cold window, wrapped in a blanket and saw how the inside of the train come alive. Within a few minutes the sounds subsided, the lights faded away – again the sound of the train running on the tracks, the darkness outside and inside, and my breath condensing on the glass of the window. When the next station arrived, the cycle was repeated again.

It was close to midnight when the train approached Farakka – where the Ganges divides into two. The main stream flows towards Bangladesh as the Padma and the side stream flows south towards the Bay of Bengal as the Hooghly. The lights could be seen from miles away – first appearing as fireflies, then turning into a collection of Christmas trees and finally transforming into the town that feeds two states with electricity. I frequently glanced at my watch, waiting for the morning to arrive but it moved awfully slowly. I tried to sleep once again but gave up after about half an hour. I looked around the compartment in search of tea or coffee but it seemed that I was the only person in the train who was awake. I returned to my seat, cold and slightly dejected. I had nothing to do but just look out into the darkness. Dawn was still about 4 hours away and I was getting impatient. Nevertheless, I decided to return to my seat. Once again I wrapped the blanket around me and leaned against the window. This position was more comfortable than lying down, as less surface area of my body was exposed to the cold. The gentle sideways motion of the moving train, the sound of the train, the star studded sky and the darkness continued. My hands and feet were considerably warm now and gradually I sank into a strange state – neither asleep nor awake. The train and all the people disappeared, so did the sound. My mind raced through the darkness under a starry night. I lost track of time and space.

As dawn approached it got more and more cold, and the fog came down to the ground level. The tracks were elevated from the surrounding areas, so the fog actually made it appear that the train was a ship sailing through a misty sea. By this time my eyes were adjusted to the dark and I could make out the shape of the individual trees in that misty ocean. They stood out like fingers of some mythical animal residing the mysterious waters. So far the color all around was black but as dawn approached it started turning mauve. I could almost see the transition occur before my eyes, though it occurred very slowly. The details began to emerge and so did a faint hint of light.

The smell of coffee brought back the running train and the people still sleeping in it.

to be continued ...